One person, however, who seems to have mastered how to handle Trump has been on top form over the past week. One who really knows how to get the better of him without even noticing. No, I am not speaking about Vladimir Putin, but, someone who may well be the greatest political mastermind of our age: our one and only Queen Elizabeth II.
Casual royal observers such as myself barely noticed the Queens fashion choices during Trumps visit, because we were too busy cringing at Trumps behaviour around her. Whether you give a fig about the royals or not and I come very much from the no fig end of the spectrum watching Trump galumph around in front of her, get in her way and generally act as if she wasnt even there was, just on a human level, throw-up-on-your-own-shoes nauseating. Shes a 92-year-old woman, show her some respect, you giant Oompa-Loompa! But, of course, expecting thoughtfulness from a man who, earlier this year, was photographed holding an umbrella over his own precious head, leaving his young son exposed to the elements, brings to mind words such as blood and stone.
And the Queen, wisely, appeared to expect none either, because it turns out she was sending us all coded messages via the medium of her brooches. Yes, her brooches read on and bow down in awe, James Bond. Twitter user @SamuraiKnitter has pointed out that on the first day of the Trump visit, the Queen wore a simple green brooch that was given to her by the Obamas to signify their friendship. On the second day, she wore a brooch given to her by Canada, a country with which Trump is less than pleased at the moment (also, it was in the shape of a snowflake, a classic Trump term for people who disagree with him.) And, for the last day, she chose a brooch the Queen Mother wore to the funeral of King George VI, so not one associated with happiness and joy. Queens brooches: 3. Trump: 0.
Is this all reading too much into it? Well, it is known the Queen does choose her brooches according to the theme of the day, such as the love knot brooch she wore to William and Kates wedding. And, let us never forget the exciting time last year when, to open parliament, she wore a hat bearing a striking resemblance to the EU flag.
Has the Queen been trying to talk to us all this time and we just didnt notice? Because we know shes not allowed to make political statements, but what if shes been sending them to us through her wardrobe? My God! I hereby declare that, like the British government, we all take an early holiday and spend the next couple of weeks combing through photos of the Queen, reading the runes of her twinsets. Its OK, guys, the Queen is totally going to fix Brexit! Cherchez the brooches!
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- This article was corrected on 18 July 2018. A previous version said the Queen wore a particular brooch to her fathers funeral; in fact, it was the Queen Mother who wore the brooch in question.
